The Girls Who Went Away: Discuss!

It’s taken me far too long to compose my thoughts about this book. Mayhem has been ever-so-patient and for this I thank her. I apologize, dear readers, I do.

The Girls Who Went Away
by Ann Fessler

This book has been on BTW’s potential-read list for quite some time (since November 23, 2008, in case you were wondering) but for some reason it kept getting passed over for something or other. This cycle we were having trouble deciding what to read so we finally thought “Why not?” And I am so glad we did.

As you know, reproductive freedom is extremely high on our inalienable human rights list and that sex education in this country needs to move from abstinence-only “education” to comprehensive education. With that mindset, The Girls Who Went Away provided a depth and nuance to my understanding of these issues, supporting and furthering their veracity and necessity in my mind. Jennifer Baumgardner, in reviewing this book for Bitch, explained: “I had always been so drawn to reproductive freedom and justice as a catalyzing issue—but had never understood or really thought about the adoption piece.” I, too, had always thought of adoption as this thrilling and positive experience for all parties involved– The Girls Who Went Away exposed me to multitudes of women for whom this was certainly not the case and forced me to confront this reality. Adoption isn’t such an open and shut case for me anymore. This book was illuminating, heartbreaking, inspiring, enraging, and brilliant in its simplicity and clarity of purpose. E v e r y o n e should read this book. Everyone.

Mayhem: speaking of heartbreaking, have you started “the girls who went away” yet? i’m halfway through and i LOVE It. each new chapter breaks my heart a bit more.
me: yes. and yes. now why couldn’t BOS have been written as well as this one?
Mayhem: MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY!!!  BOS would’ve been so much better if it had been structured like the girls who went away. this book has everything i wish BOS would’ve had.

To have, to have not (a child)

A few weeks ago the boyf and I once again headed over to Bluestockings, a feminist bookstore on the Lower East Side of Manhattan, for a reading by two of my favorite third wave feminists, Amy Richards and Jennifer Baumgardner. Back in college they contributed to my click moment through their book ManifestA: Young Women, Feminism, and the Future, a wonderful third-wave feminist overview that at the time I devoured and although it has lost its luster in my eyes due to the expansion of my own feminist consciousness, I still appreciate and recommend it often. The readings were of Amy and Jennifer’s new books, Amy with Opting In: Having a Child Without Losing Yourself, and Jennifer with Abortion & Life. An outsider might view these books as contradictory but upon further discussion these books are not contradictory at all but are in fact quite complimentary and were solidly presented together.

link him like a lollypop should be linked (6/20-6/26)

yet another heat wave in new york city has caused this gal to stay indoors all day reading books and watching old episodes of LOST. not that this is a bad thing, mind you, i only wish i were the proud owner of a backyard and a slip-n-slide. alas, for now i’m content to sip my glass of wine and share a few links with you. it’s going to be a doozy of a bloggeriffic week–we plan to unveil the new reading group book, we have a guest blogger to share her sage wisdom, and as usual we’ll keep up with the snarky posts that i hope you’ve come to love. so pop back often this week, but as for now…linkage onwards…

don’t just sit there…do something!

so every week i post links to stories that have piqued my interest, and more often than not the stories that draw my attention the most are ones that make me upset or angry. i spend a lot of time frustrated at the current state of the world and the way in which society treat women. this week i shall not be negative nancy, and neither should you! it is easy to become overwhelmed, throw your hands up and say “there’s nothing i can do!” oh but you can! this week i’ve compiled just a few of the many ways you can become an active feminist. although it may seem silly, writing letters and signing petitions does make a difference! take 5 minutes out of your day and check out some of these websites. do your part in fighting for gender equality throughout the world. don’t just talk. DO.